“He’s 31. She just turned 19. We worked with her since she was 16.”
I wish your husband were the one writing to me, because this seems like it should beproblem to solve, not yours. Your husband is the one who violated your marriage, who gave your anniversary this new and unfortunate meaning. And ultimately, he's the one responsible for making it right — which includes figuring out how to salvage a day that was once so special to you until he ruined it.
it. Clearly, you're both invested in your marriage, or you wouldn't still be here two years later fighting for it.
1) Go to therapy together: Have the two of you ever considered doing couples counseling? If not, maybe this year's anniversary is the perfect opportunity to schedule your first session. A therapist might be able to help you work through some of those lingering trust issues you've described, and open up better lines of communication between the two of you.
3) Create a fresh start at home: Is there a big project that the two of you have been putting off for a while now? Perhaps you've been meaning to repaint the bedroom, or reorganize the kitchen, or finally start that garden in your backyard. Maybe your anniversary can be the day you two finally cross that project off your to-do list. You'd get to spend some real time together without needing to do the whole song and dance of an anniversary celebration.
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