Dear Care and Feeding: I've realized that the dreams I had of enjoying this house together will never become a reality.
The answer is simple: outsource! Truly, I think you have two options available, which involve no contact with your mom.
Your first option is to ask your colleagues for help. If you have a receptionist or admin who receives the mail and packages, tell them that absolutely no mail from your mother is to come your way—that you don’t even want to know it arrived. If that’s not how your office is staffed, then stop going to the mailroom yourself and enlist a colleague to act as your mailbox “bouncer.” Bribe them with Starbucks if you need to.
I told him it didn’t mean we didn’t need him or that it wasn’t easier when he was home, just that we could manage when he was away, which I think is a good thing. He said that he wouldn’t be able to take care of both kids 24 hours a day for 10 days on his own if I needed to go away, and I said I thought he could just fine.
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