How White Parents Can Talk To Their Kids About Race

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How White Parents Can Talk To Their Kids About Race
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Here's an age-by-age guide for white parents to addressing racism and privilege with their children.

Babies also pick up cues from their surroundings, like the people they see in their communities.

Around the ages of 3 or 4, many children remark on race or ethnicity-related differences they notice, like skin tones or hair types. Bigler noted that these observations may imply bias or may be more neutral . She added, “In the first case, you might say, ‘That man is African American, and his hair is not weird. His hair is different than yours, but I think that it is really great! People often have hair like others in their family. You have hair like your ____.

“It is equally important to talk about how those differences may cause them to experience life differently,” Hollier noted. “Give them string and ask them to weave and tangle it into a spider web. Then say, ‘Great, now untangle it,‘” she explained. “They’ll try for a few minutes and realize it’s difficult and not fun and give up. Explain that the unfairness against people with brown skin is a lot like this tangled web, and it’s been tangled up since before their mom was born, before their grandparents were born, even before their grandparents’ grandparents were born.

To combat this, parents should pay attention to any statements or behaviors from their children that suggest bias. They should continue to choose racially diverse dolls and other toys for their children and expose them to books and shows that feature diverse characters. It’s also extremely important to foster conversation around differences to address the subtle messages they’re getting from media and everyday life.

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