How Much Kimchi Do I Have to Eat to Stop Feeling Like a Bad Korean?

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How Much Kimchi Do I Have to Eat to Stop Feeling Like a Bad Korean?
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'Adopted at seven months old, I grew up burying my Korean identity and presenting myself as culturally white. And then, I learned to cook.'

When I was six years old, I had my first bite of kimchi, and I cried. The spicy, fiery-red fermented cabbage made my eyes water and sweat run down my face, as if my body were immediately rejecting it. As I wiped my eyes, the group of Korean college students around me laughed, telling me I’d get used to the spiciness. I was sure that I never would, because I wasn’t like them. On the outside, we looked the same, but on the inside I knew I was white, like my adoptive parents.

It turns out it was salt. My mother told me that when I was a baby, I got so excited eating Chinese food that I swallowed a piece of cashew chicken whole and nearly choked. She said it was because I was too impatient to chew, but I like to think that I was just trying to get soy sauce into my body faster.

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