By making ourselves matter, we are making others matter.
The idea of personal growth gets bad press at times because critics think of it as purely selfish.As readers of my posts will know, I often write about topics to do with personal growth and positive psychology, and my most recent book is about my insights about what leads people to live a good life.
I can understand that personal growth might sound like a selfish thing to pursue, but paradoxically, what humanistic therapists believe and what the research evidence points toward is that the more developed, emotionally mature and authentic we are as people, the more our gaze turns outwards to others. This is not because we are trying to find ways to use others to further our own ends, but rather that this is what psychologically well-developed and fully functioning people do.
Making other people matter in our lives is one of the most important things we can do, and I think it is part and parcel of personal growth; it’s what happens when we begin to re-examine our own priorities.
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