Seriously, parents. Wasn't this holiday easier when we were kids?
are at peak age—old enough to have very strong opinions about what they want to dress up as and feel they need to compete with their peers, but not old enough to have their own J.O.B.s so they can pay for their own shit. For example, my daughter came across a cute Hermioneonline that she loved. It was 80 bucks. EIGHTY DOLLARS, ARE YOU KIDDING ME, CHILD.
What ever happened to ransacking the old dress-up bin and piecing together something that resembled a rockstar? Or hitting up Goodwill and getting decked out for like $5? Also, I don’t know about your kids, but in my happy suburban world, there are no less than five “trick-or-treat” events—between, schools, churches, hospitals, etc.
And there weren’t 82 candy-overloaded events that necessitated costuming back then. There was Halloween night and maybe a parade at school. I swear if my kids come home with one more “trick or treat!” flyer I won’t even need a costume. I’ll already look the part of the evil witch. Even our grocery store tried pulling that shit.
So here’s what I propose. Let’s dial it back a notch and give our kids a simple, fun, old school Halloween. This is what we’ll need:None of these fancy Darth Vader or Paw Patrol light up talking buckets that cost a small fortune for collecting candy. If I have to replace the batteries in my kids’ BUCKET, we’ve officially gone too far, people.
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