.MicheleFazekas, the co-showrunner of AgentCarter and currently on TheBoys spinoff, came out to her writers’ room on Zoom
For the first time in my entire career I wasn’t on a show, wasn’t on a pilot, wasn’t under a studio deal. And once the initial panic was over, I did what we all tried to do — made it work. Made it kinda normal. Built new routines, got great at supervising Zoom school for my kids — I am so amazing at fractions now. I had my masks, I had my toilet paper.
Much has been written about the effects of that isolation, and all the introspection that went along with it. And more than a few things have been written about people discovering their own queerness during quarantine. That was me. And though the process was at times turbulent and hard, we all came through it.came calling. We took over a writers room that we didn’t hire, always a tricky prospect. And luckily they were all smart, and dynamic, and lovely.
My performance was: My identity is the one you know. The one that went into the pandemic as a straight, married showrunner with kids, the one who does what she’s supposed to do, ticks all the boxes, doesn’t disappoint people, doesn’t make waves. I look like someone who knows themselves, has their shit together, makes decisions, proceeds with confidence and authority. And while I was out to many people in my real life, Zoom felt different. Daunting.
The good news is, you can build intimacy over a screen. It just takes a little longer. And when it does happen, it feels special somehow. You can see it coming — the preparation someone makes when they’re about to disclose something vulnerable. And every time, the disclosure was met with support, and kindness, and love.
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