A new lawsuit against Brown University has sparked debate about the secrecy of police departments at private colleges in the U.S. Such private police forces often don't have to disclose arrest records or incident reports. (AP Video: Rodrique Ngowi)
Joseph Goodman, al.com Stay hydrated with Joe’s free newsletter, SPORTS! Happy Hour. Here’s the link to sign up.Here’s the problem with Paul Finebaum, Senator from Alabama .Is Legend going to hit up AL.
com’s national award-winning Michael Casagrande and scream into his ear?People are also reading… I’m not going to say that Legend made the Paul Finebaum Show, but the guy’s name is literally Legend. You figure it out. Finebaum says he might want to run for U.S. Senate. It makes sense. People like Legend, the people of Alabama, are the fans who gave Finebaum his power. Finebaum can now represent us in the Halls of Congress. Bring home the bacon, Paul. We need some major upgrades to Legion Field, your old stomping grounds, and while you’re at it Huntsville needs a new stadium, too. You know, for when you open up the new Space Force Academy in the Rocket City. Everyone loves Finebaum. He’s a shoe-in. This is going to be a dream for college football fans. Football coach Tommy Tuberville as the governor and Hall of Fame radio personality Finebaum as a U.S. Senator. What’s next? Who knows? Maybe basketball coach Bruce Pearl can run for the other Senate seat and make it a triumvirate. Finebaum’s got my vote, for sure. I give him my full endorsement, and I don’t even care that he voted for President Donald Trump to send troops to Portland and declare an immediate crackdown on anyone who supports the rise of the Oregon Ducks. Actually, that makes sense now that college football is trying to leave Alabama behind. Fans of the Oregon Ducks were getting too cocky, those fashion-forward thieves of Bo Nix and all their Nike money. Who’s laughing now? Beating Oregon State in the final Civil War was … well, we won’t go there.First up, Senator Finebaum should be the permanent grand marshal of a new Iron Bowl parade to be held every Friday morning after Thanksgiving and the day before the big game. The parade should rotate between Alabama’s three biggest cities, which means Huntsville, Mobile and Montgomery. When the game is in Mobile, Senator Finebaum can throw Moon Pies to the crowd. When the game is in Huntsville, Senator Finebaum will dress up like an astronaut in a full spacesuit. As for Montgomery, I’m open for ideas. Send me your emails. Maybe Senator Finebaum can parachute out the back of a plane from Maxwell Air Force Base wearing nothing but a football helmet and a Speedo while holding a couple American flags.Montgomery’s Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail at Capitol Hill needs to rebrand its “Senator Course” as the Senator Paul Finebaum. You know, for when Senator Finebaum brings the U.S Open to the state. Then there’s Rickwood Field and Major League Baseball. Senator Finebaum, let’s make Rickwood the annual home of at least one Braves game every season. Or maybe just bring an entire MLB team to Birmingham. It doesn’t have to be the Braves. I love the Braves. Just steal the White Sox from Chicago. No one likes Chicago anymore. Use the troops! We need a national rodeo in Troy, too. Can we make this happen? I can be a rodeo clown, of course. Senator Finebaum can ride the bulls in his football helmet and Speedo. Bruce Pearl is in charge of horses. Governor Tubs, we’ll find a job for you. Maybe cleaning the stalls or something. I don’t really care for politics. Really, it’s not my thing. I just hope that people in power know the difference between right from wrong.But what about clear-cutting the national forests for Alabama billionaire Jimmy Rane? It’s a gray area, and they tell me that’s the deal with politics. Does it mean a better quarterback for the Auburn Tigers? If so, give me a 50-inch chainsaw and get out of the way.I know, what about Head Boss Man of Alabama’s new National Pro Wrestling Center on top of Sand Mountain?Legend can be the voice of the people. Senator Finebaum is the new voice of the little man. Why stop at Senator, though? Hear me out. President Finebaum could do so much more for Alabama.MAILBAG SOUND OFF Got a question for Joe? Want to get something off your chest? Send Joe an email about what’s on your mind. Let your voice be heard. Ask him anything for the weekly mailbag.
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