We can survive the magic — and heartbreak — of the holidays just fine.
Close your eyes and sing it with me Amy Grant-style, “It’s the most wonderful time of the year!” It’s a magical time often filled with lights and glitter, family and friend gatherings, gift exchanges, photos with Santa, sugar cookie meal-replacements and other cherished traditions. But for moms like myself who are co-parenting young children, the holidays can bring a mix of wonderment, anxiety, relief and heartache. It’s funny how so many emotions can co-exist.
Sharing custody with an ex-spouse creates a unique dynamic. On the one hand, the 50/50 time split can provide much-needed time to prepare for the festivities, and on the other hand, it can leave an emotional void when your children aren’t with you to share in the magic. While the logistical benefits of shared custody are clear, the emotional challenges are equally significant. I find the Christmas season to be a cherished time for togetherness, and nothing underscores the absence of your children more than the quiet of a house that should be filled with laughter and excitement.
The time apart can also disrupt your own sense of tradition. Perhaps you always decorated the tree together or always went to look at the window decorations downtown as a family, but that can’t be an easy guarantee anymore. Adjusting to the new normal of only having those moments part-time can feel like a loss.
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