This story explores the challenges of balancing family obligations with personal time and resources, focusing on a woman's frustration with her husband's brother's constant requests for extended family vacations.
A few years ago, my husband and I knew that it was time to move from our high-cost-of-living coastal city. His parents lived in the Midwest, and mine lived in a smaller town on our coast. In the end, we moved closer to his aging parents, given that all of their other children had moved out of town. I’m not saying that moving to an affordable town with grandparents for child care backup was all altruistic, but it has definitely been win-win-win for us, the grandparents, and the absent siblings.
We’ve had a fair bit to do, as my mother-in-law got ill and eventually passed. And though my father-in-law is active and has a friend network, everyone is glad he is not here without family.parents, my in-laws were older, and my husband could get a job here. I try to compensate for the distance by doing two 10-day-long trips with my child to see my parents each year. That wipes out more than half of my combined vacation/sick time, but I need my kid to have some sort of relationship with my parents. She is too young to travel independently. My parents have various legitimate reasons (please just trust me) such that it is a big lift for them to travel here. This situation does not bring me joy, but needs must. Where I am starting to see red is with my husband’s brother. He lives a few hours away from my parents, and anytime we are out east, he suggests we tack on a few extra days at their house so our kid and theirs can see each other. They propose these vacations that for them are drivable long weekends but for us eat up vacation days and money because they are nowhere near where we live. And my husband always wants to do this, because he and his brother really value forging a relationship between the cousins—but we are counting our PTO by the hour and avoiding any other sort of family vacation to make this happen.? They say it’s because they don’t dare take their daughter on a plane because she will misbehave. I’m sorr
FAMILY OBLIGATIONS TRAVEL STRESS FINANCIAL BURDENS COUSIN RELATIONSHIPS RELATIONSHIP DIFFERENCES
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