Congrats to former Jezebel senior writer joannarothkopf on her Emmy win with the writing staff of LastWeekTonight. Read her 2016 investigative piece about wearing a tail for a week here:
—you get to look cooler than you would otherwise; you get some vanity photographs taken, and a byline at BuzzFeed or something. If I wore a tail for a week, I thought, I probably wouldn’t have any major revelations, but I’d have a funny story to tell my children, should I be so lucky to be fertile.Next thing I knew, I had expensed a
I walk bravely through the streets of the West Village, tail dragging limply behind me, to my boyfriend’s parents’ apartment for dinner. While I’m there, his father warns me about my stunt: “One day you are going to be really embarrassed you did this.” He doesn’t know that day has already come.I’m sad today because I decide to wear a new sweater and feel like I look really nice, but then remember that I have to put on the tail.
Having a tail will do that to you—make you both numbly apathetic and constantly suspicious, like you are normal except you also aren’t normal at all. You’re wearing a tail.As I walk to work, everything is fine until a man with wet, collar-length hair passes me and turns back, evidently to see how my front looks. “I HAVE A TAIL!!!” I thought of screaming after him.
On the subway this morning, I catch myself in a reflection in the window. Save for a sliver of green peeking out from behind my leg, I look—dare I say it?—almost normal. I silently rejoice. Across the subway car I see a seat that is wide enough to fit both me and my tail and I spend several minutes scheming how to make my way there without attracting too much attention to me and my bottom son, and, in a wonderful surge of self-confidence I drop my tail and let it flop behind me, free and perky.
This adjustment, plus listening to music through headphones, feels like a good, everyday solution to having a tail—if people are commenting on my appearance, I can’t really hear, and at least it isn’t flapping around behind me without my consent. To be in control of my own tail’s movements feels—and I can’t believe I’m writing this—empowering.
United States Latest News, United States Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Is It Weird That I Love to Watch Mukbangers Eat on YouTube?Immediately after reading this article by pdotbrathw8, EIC carolynkylstra Slacked, 'it's genuinely informative and interesting and bizarre and thought provoking all at once.' Do you need another reason to click?
Read more »
9-Year-Old Fills Chapstick Tube With Cheese To Eat In Class, Becomes Internet HeroA genius 9-year-old filled an old lip balm tube with cheese so she could snack on it during class, and the entire internet is here for the idea.
Read more »
Meet the Chocolate Cake You're Supposed to Eat DailyThe Hot Cocoa Cake from Zingerman's is rich enough for dessert, lean enough for breakfast, and simple enough to be tucked into your lunchbox.
Read more »
Climate change is affecting the food you eat. Here's how - CNN VideoThe carbon dioxide in the air is now changing the food coming out of the ground, scientists say. CNN's DrSanjayGupta reports on how rising CO2 levels could have a negative impact on our food supply.
Read more »