DM168 TONGUE IN CHEEK: The Borg Identity: DD Mabuza has the superpowers of Wolverine coursing through his veins

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DM168 TONGUE IN CHEEK: The Borg Identity: DD Mabuza has the superpowers of Wolverine coursing through his veins
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What really happened when South Africa’s Deputy President went to Russia to receive medical treatment for poisoning?

Wednesday, 4 August 2021, was a momentous day in the history of South Africa. It marked a major turning point. This was the day DD Mabuza, the deputy president of the country, returned to South Africa from Russia, where he had been receiving medical treatment for poisoning.The truth is far, far stranger than anyone could imagine. And its consequences are so far-reaching that, in the end, the world will never be the same again.

“What?” gasped DD, struggling to reach a semi-sitting position. He felt strangely weak yet oddly strong at the same time. “Okay, it was terrible American propaganda, but what we’ve done is something like what was done to Mr Wolverine. We have put liquid titanium into your veins. You will feel an extraordinary strength building up inside you. You are not quite ready, but in a few days’ time you will come into full power.”“Quiet, now,” said Vlad. “Just relax. It’s all under control. As we cycle that liquid titanium through your veins, we will also replace your internal organs one by one.

Next, he took a stroll to Luthuli House – or, really, a run, for his titanium-enhanced legs covered the distance between Pretoria and Johannesburg in a mere 10 minutes. Within seconds, that building was a smoking ruin.“Ace!” he cried, his massive fist crashing through Ace’s front door. Before him stood the ANC’s suspended secretary general, still in his pyjamas. He’d been working from home.“Great,” said Ace.

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