'How do I talk to my boyfriend about his professional motivation and his problematic gaming without starting a fight or making him feel bad?' Read a psychologist's response here:
, a clinical psychologist who specializes in family conflict. This conversation has been edited for length and clarity.My boyfriend and I live together, and we both work from home. He doesn't like his current low-paying job, but he doesn't know what he wants to do long term.
How do I talk to my boyfriend about his professional motivation and his problematic gaming without starting a fight or making him feel bad? I just want him to reach his potential and feel good about his occupation. —Jodi Adewale is a clinical psychologist who specializes in family conflict and has written about everything from adult male psychology to mental health in the workplace.There's no quick fix for trying to motivate someone.
I would consider gaming like drugs, gambling or porn — in excess, too much can create a problem. Is it causing problems with your physical health, your work, your finances or your relationships? Is it causing legal problems? If gaming isn't causing you problems in any of those areas, I would say keep going.
I hear this from couples all the time:"I don't want to say anything because it's going to turn into a fight." But there needs to be more assertive communication where you stand up and speak your needs while respecting his needs.
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