I don’t want them to grow up thinking this is an acceptable relationship.
When is it appropriate to be honest with kids about what an asshole their deadbeat dad is? My girlfriend’s ex walked out on their four kids and has seen them once every few years since then. Not only are his visits spaced out, he’ll promise the kids he’s coming to see them a few times a year, make real, detailed plans with them, and then text my girlfriend a few hours after he’s supposed to be there that he’s not coming.
I get that their mom can’t say how she actually feels, but every time she encourages them to get their hopes up and then makes excuses for him and assures them next time will be different. Watching these kids eagerly rearrange their lives only to be crushed, confused, and blame themselves is making me think that this is unhealthy and will lead to self-esteem issues. I don’t want them to think being manipulated is a normal, acceptable part of a relationship.
There are always a few days of behavior problems that only happen after he lets them down, and I can’t help but think this is affecting their development. They have a fantastic, solid, loving mom, and I have been lucky enough to be in their lives for three years, so they have examples of real adults they can depend on. But I feel like knowing how to recognize someone treating them badly is as important as seeing models of how they should be treated.
But you’re right; children don’t deserve to be repeatedly lied to by their parents, and they don’t need one of their parents to enable the empty promises the other makes. The oldest of the children is 14, and that’s a great age to ask them to think about what is and isn’t true about their relationship with their dad. Does he show up when he says he will? How many times have they waited for him, only to be disappointed? How would they like to proceed the next time their father breaks his promise? The children’s wishes should be honored here.
United States Latest News, United States Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Dear Care and Feeding: My Daughter’s Friend Group Drama Has Gotten Out of ControlNow Samantha's mother is insisting that we choose between her old friend group and Samantha, and I'm just over all of this.
Read more »
Dear Care and Feeding: Why Won’t My Son Stay True to Himself?My sweet teenage son seems to be morphing into a clone of his new friend.
Read more »
Dear Care and Feeding: My Sister Has Been Saying Horrible Things About My Parenting Behind My BackI had valued her help raising my daughter … until now.
Read more »
Fauci says three shots of COVID-19 vaccine is 'optimal care'Three doses of a COVID-19 vaccine is the 'optimal care' but two doses of the Pfizer/BioNTech or Moderna vaccines or one of the Johnson & Johnson vaccine remains the U.S. government's official definition of fully vaccinated, top U.S. infectious disease expert Anthony Fauci said on Sunday.
Read more »
Covid in Scotland: Care staff can get booster 'without losing wages'Health Secretary Humza Yousaf said booster uptake was lower among social care workers than other sectors.
Read more »
Tom Holland Doesn't Care That He's Shorter Than Costar GF ZendayaSpider-Man can be shorter than MJ without so much fuss, so says Tom.
Read more »