I don't know how to stop my mom from treating my son in this horrible way.
My son “John” was a loved and happy only child, and so was his daughter “Amelia,” my wonderful, sensitive, gifted 9-year-old granddaughter. My daughter-in-law “Marie,” however, always wanted more children, and seemed to go a little crazy when that didn’t happen. Eventually John agreed to becoming foster parents, which meant having to work longer hours when Marie quit her job to be a full-time foster mom. They’ve had over a dozen children pass through their home, from infants to early teens.
It felt like a knife twisting between my ribs. I of course kept that to myself and congratulated Emily sincerely. I knew I wanted to say something about this to my mom eventually, but I was waiting until the next time we were alone.Tragically, Emily found out about a week later that the pregnancy wasn’t viable. Now, it just feels petty to bring up an offhand, excited comment to my mom. If I were still in therapy, I could process this with my therapist, but I haven’t found one in my new city.
So, my question is: What do I do? How do I swallow my jealousy and my shame at being jealous of someone who subsequently experienced a heartbreaking loss and move on? Do I talk to my mom about this? Or am I just projecting my own issues onto this one comment?
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