In today's Dear Annie column, Annie Lane hears from a reader who is tired of fighting for scraps in her relationship with her boyfriend of 14 years.
Choosing to play golf with his friends over spending the day with his girlfriend on her birthday is just one of the many reasons Annie thinks this couple's problem is deeper than time spent together.
He owns a house where his ex-wife and her husband live, and while he says legal issues prevent him from selling, there’s been little effort to resolve it. On weekends, instead of spending time together, he prioritizes helping friends and relatives, often for free. When I express frustration, he dismisses my feelings, even turning the blame on me. For example, on my birthday , he went golfing instead, and one of his friends joked about him needing “permission.
It sounds like you’re burning the candle at both ends. You’re carrying a heavy load, taking care of him, his kids and your own, while he spends his time enjoying activities with friends. Of course you’re not wrong for wanting more; it’s perfectly reasonable to crave a partner who invests as much effort into the relationship as you do.
Annie-Lane @Exmeter @Mrose @Lll
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