My husband confesses he hid his true nature, and I can’t put up with it anymore.
Do not expect your husband to be grateful for any of the efforts you have made on his behalf during the course of your marriage. During the time you were dating, he hid from you the fact that he was a verbal abuser. Now you know he was a fraud. Don’t feel guilty for protecting yourself and reclaiming your life.A month after his funeral, my sister-in-law gave her kids their father’s clothes, instructed them to go through them, keep what they wanted or sell or donate the rest.
This bothers me greatly. I’m so hurt that everything is being changed. It’s like she’s trying to erase him — all within one year! Should I ask her why everything is being changed and disposed of so soon? And should I feel so hurt about this?Your former sister-in-law appears to be more pragmatic than sentimental, and there is nothing wrong with that. She knew her late husband could no longer use his wardrobe and saw no reason to keep the items hanging in the closet.
People are cautioned not to make “important decisions” for about a year after a spouse passes, and your former SIL has wisely refrained. If you want to ask her why she’s changing things, do so in a non-accusatory way that won’t offend her. I suspect that you are feeling hurt because you are still not ready to accept that your brother is gone forever. You might find it helpful to talk about it with someone with expertise in the grieving process.
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