Dear Abby helps a woman who has a friend that makes constant trips to see her and wants to find a polite way to tell her no, avoiding a possible meltdown.
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: I have an old friend who lives an hour from me. I visit her for the day and come home. I have never invited her to spend the night at my home, nor do I expect her to invite me for a sleepover when I drive down to see her. The last two times she has visited me, she has arrived at 9 a.m. I assumed she came early because she wanted to spend the whole day. She expected me to sit and talk all day. She refused to do anything except eat and talk. I am not a sitter, and I hated doing it, but she’s a good friend, so I put up with it. Both times, around 5 p.m., she went to her car and brought in luggage expecting to spend the night. Then we ended up staying up until midnight so she could talk some more.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at
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