Dear Abby helps a father struggling with his daughter’s toxic relationship.
I am a single parent of two girls. My oldest, “Becca,” is 17. She has been dating this guy and, as soon as she graduates, plans to move in with him and two of his friends . What worries me is that their relationship is pretty toxic. They are always fighting. I have begged her not to move in with him, but she won’t budge.Becca has some abandonment issues. Her mom left us when Becca was a baby, and my second wife was emotionally abusive to everyone before we divorced.
How can I show Becca she is making a huge mistake? I don’t want her ending up stuck in a horrible relationship. I’m also worried about her getting pregnant right away because neither of them can control themselves. Please help. —After a year of fighting with her boyfriend, Becca may change her mind about moving in with him once she graduates. However, if she doesn’t, try to arrive at a compromise with her. Tell her you love her, and your door will always be open if she needs to come home.
Ask Becca if she would be willing to start using long-term birth control, such as an IUD or contraceptive implant, to ensure she’s protected from an unplanned pregnancy, which could disrupt her life. Your family doctor can explain her options to her if she’s willing. Last year, I gave my dad a cool flashlight for his birthday. It was rechargeable and had a feature that made it work as a lantern. He seemed excited about it and later told me again that he’d been using it.
Is this kind of forgetfulness a sign of something bigger I should be worried about? He does the typical old man thing of repeating stories from the good ole days, but this sort of outright forgetting is new. —cause for concern. If your mother is still in the picture, mention to her how out of character this was of your father. Ask if she has noticed any changes. If she has, suggest that when he sees his doctor for his next physical, he is evaluated neurologically to be sure nothing is wrong.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.
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