I am sure that my daughter and some of her family have been tested and “suspect” but are saying nothing to spare my feelings.
In my junior year of high school, my girlfriend got pregnant. We married and had a son. Although our marriage was very rocky, two years later we had a daughter. I knew from the beginning she was not my biological child because of her blood type, but I loved her all the same. I never told my daughter or my ex-wife what I knew. Four years after her birth, we divorced and I retained custody of my two children.
I later remarried and had one more child. Fifty years have now passed. With DNA testing being so prevalent, I’m at a loss. Most of my family have been tested and show up linked to me. My daughter, her children and grandchildren do not show up anywhere on my DNA chart. They live 2,000 miles away, but we communicate weekly. I am sure that she and some of her family have been tested and “suspect” but are saying nothing to spare my feelings. I feel I need to clear the air with my daughter, but my wife says to let sleeping dogs lie. Advice?I agree with your wife. You raised your daughter, and she is as much your child as if she had “come from your loins.” You ARE her dad.
At my mother’s funeral , a few of my mom’s old school friends, male and female, showed up and stopped to tell us how they had gone to school with her and wanted to pay their respects. One gentleman said he went on a few dates with her. Another confessed he had the biggest crush on her in school. Whether they had wives at home or not never crossed our minds at the time. We were just so touched that they came, and that after all these years she still meant something to them. And we loved hearing about the crush. We were so happy and tickled to hear these stories about our school-aged mom at a time when our hearts were broken because of her loss.— BILLIE JO IN NEW JERSEYThank you for your letter. Your sentiments were echoed by many other readers.
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