Have you experienced parental gaslighting? It's time you learn to trust yourself again.
Gaslighting undermines the child's ability to trust themselves.experience. It involves betrayal by the person you are supposed to be able to trust most. For children, the experience undermines their security, as they are dependent on the parent for survival.causes pain and damage to a child on many levels. This post will focus on how this affects the child’s ability to trust themselves and how to repair this damage.
Gaslighting is a form of lying where the person being lied to is made to feel crazy, stupid, or damaged for believing what is actually true. Here are a few examples. When Rene turned 16, her father encouraged her to learn to drive and get her license. She told him that she didn’t see any point in learning to drive if she did not have a car. He told her that he would get her a car when she got her license. Months later, after she passed her driving test, they had this conversation:Rene: You said that you would get me a car when I get my driver’s license.Rene: I got my license because you said you would get me a car.
Stan’s mother did not want to acknowledge to her son that she was with a man in their home the night before, so she lied about it and then gaslighted him. The gaslighting involves conveying to him that he does not know the difference between reality and his dreams. A single episode of parental gaslighting will probably leave the child with some confusion about a particular occasion or about the ability to trust the parents in certain circumstances. When a child is repeatedly gaslighted by a parent, the child is very likely to develop a sense that they cannot trust themselves. Like Rene and Stan, these children are repeatedly told that they cannot trust their senses, memories, and understanding of reality.
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