Carolyn Hax: Parent hits the ceiling over ‘egregious’ class superlatives

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Carolyn Hax: Parent hits the ceiling over ‘egregious’ class superlatives
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A parent who complained about “egregious” class superlatives got an unsatisfying response, and now wants a reality check.

My daughter’s second-grade teacher gave each kid a certificate at the end of the year. Many had “Nice Friend” or “Good Reader” on them, but a few stood out: “Class Clown,” “Miss Manners” and “Social Butterfly” seemed most egregious to me. My daughter was “Miss Manners,” and she is indeed polite.

The school principal thought the certificates and labels were “heartfelt.” I’ve also contacted the district superintendent but haven’t received a reply. Am I being too sensitive in thinking these are backhanded compliments, or just plain rude labels? I would’ve been even more upset had my child been labeled “Class Clown.”I don’t love some of these, either. I might have said to the teacher: “Superlatives always flirt with stereotypes, and I know you mean well, and I’m seriously splitting hairs. But ‘Funniest’ and ‘Best Manners’ would land better because they’re rewarding vs. labeling.

“I am writing to withdraw my complaint about the certificates given in Teacher’s class. While I maintain that, for example, ‘Funniest’ and ‘Best Manners’ would have flirted less with troublesome stereotypes, the awards were obviously well intentioned and missed by small margins. My reaction, meanwhile, was out of proportion to any offense on the teacher’s part.

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