The rest of the family, hoping to save face, wants the letter writer to lie about a sibling’s prison sentence.
My only sibling recently pleaded guilty to a crime that will land them in prison for the better part of a decade. My mother, our only remaining parent, lives near my sibling, while I live across the country with my two kids.
My mom got very angry with me and told me she disagreed. Several days later, my aunt emailed me “on behalf of” herself, her two adult kids and her brother to tell me they all feel very strongly that I do not share any details about my sibling with our extended family members when I visit them next month. She even specifically included a lie I could tell instead.They are concerned about their reputation, their “good name” and their ability to be respected in their hometown.
What may I say to my aunt regarding her email? I hadn’t even decided what I was going to tell my extended family about my sibling, but now I am just so angry with these family members for trying to strong-arm me into lying that it’s hard to think straight about the situation.You communicated with your mom as a courtesy, information only, about choices you are fully entitled to make for yourself. That is the baseline fact here.
Now you have new stress on top of the original stress, all of which will take some time and attention to manage, but it, too, is a distraction. The basic fact is still this: You communicated with your mom as a courtesy, information only.
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