From breakingviews: Alice takes a rare trip down the Wall Street rabbit hole and visits Tweedle Asset Management. Edward Chancellor explains the upside-down financial world with the fairy tale rewrite
Actress Veronika Miklova of The National Black Theatre of Prague performs during a press rehearsal of"Alice in Wonderland" in Madrid September 28, 2011.
“But why own a bond, if it doesn’t pay interest?” replied Alice, who’d read her Homer and Sylla assiduously. “That’s exactly what they didn’t do!” replied Otto scornfully. “They stuck with value, and as everybody knows value sucks. If you want to outperform, you’ve got to show your FANGs.”“If you’ve sacked all your fundamental investors, who manages your equity portfolios?”
“Forget about equities, Alice,” Otto advised kindly, “that’s no longer where the action is. If you want to meet real investors, go visit the VC team.” So, a week later, Alice pushed through the swing doors to enter Tweedle’s fancy offices in Menlo Park. Everything was just as Alice had imagined, complete with beanbags and free candy-vending machines.
A few days later, Alice spent the day with the private equity team, Tweedle’s highest-compensated employees.“There are only three things you need to know about private equity: leverage, leverage and leverage,” replied a slick young man in a bespoke Savile Row suit. “Our business is financial engineering.”
“Everything seems so strange,” Alice thought to herself. “I don’t think I’m cut out to be an investor, after all. Perhaps I’d enjoy economics research more.”
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