How can we recognize our current and former spouses in our final resting places?
DEAR ERIC: My wife and I married two years ago. We were both widowed after long happy marriages and feel blessed that we have found each other.
When our first spouses died, they were each interred in different local cemeteries. In each case, the headstones include each surviving spouse’s name, birth year and, of course, no death year . So, when my wife and I die, we would be interred with our first spouses, with no reference to second spouses. And yet, to take our names off of the current headstones and be interred together somewhere else seems not right either.
I just want my second, happy, marriage recognized, as well as my first, happy, marriageDEAR THINKING: It’s a gift to those who will survive you that you’re thinking through this now. Perhaps the easiest option is for you and your wife to redesign the plaques to list both spouses. So, the headstone where you’ll be interred would list both of your marriages, as would the headstone where your wife will be interred, should you choose not to be interred together.
Now, some might quibble that you can’t be in two places so why would your name be? This has precedent, though. For instance, the graves of some veterans buried at Arlington National Cemetery list spouses who are buried elsewhere. A headstone is a monument that gives family a place to visit and, often, aids historical researchers. Memorializing both of your marriages in this way honors the lives you lived and the people you loved.
If you purchase a product or register for an account through a link on our site, we may receive compensation.and agree that your clicks, interactions, and personal information may be collected, recorded, and/or stored by us and social media and other third-party partners in accordance with our
United States Latest News, United States Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Asking Eric: Remarried after spouses died, couple is unsure how to re-arrange burial plansJoe Nguyen is a digital strategist for The Denver Post. Previously he was the online prep sports editor. Prior to that, he covered Adams County and Aurora in the YourHub section. He has previously covered Colorado’s Asian-American communities as editor for Asian Avenue magazine and AsiaXpress.com.
Read more »
Asking Eric: What should I do about the headstone that has my name on it?Plus: If she wanted to see the kids, she could — but that would ruin her self-pitying narrative.
Read more »
Asking Eric: Should my tombstone be next to my ex-spouse or my new spouse?In today's Asking Eric column, R. Eric Thomas responds to someone's question about where they should be buried after their death.
Read more »
Asking Eric: Partner’s mother confesses uncomfortable paternity secretJoe Nguyen is a digital strategist for The Denver Post. Previously he was the online prep sports editor. Prior to that, he covered Adams County and Aurora in the YourHub section. He has previously covered Colorado’s Asian-American communities as editor for Asian Avenue magazine and AsiaXpress.com.
Read more »
Asking Eric: My partner’s mother shared an uncomfortable family secret with meWhile I can appreciate that she trusts me enough to confide in me, I didn’t want to know this info, and now that I do, I wish I didn’t.
Read more »
Asking Eric: My billionaire brother won’t help with my daughter’s medical billsIn today's Asking Eric column, R. Eric Thomas responds to someone who is disappointed their wealthy sibling doesn't assist their family's large medical bills.
Read more »