Dear Amy: I am a recovering alcoholic, currently celebrating seven years of sobriety.
You state that these enablers may not understand the negative power of alcohol. And yet they do understand this power because the job of keeping “Emily” alive is absorbing the full attention of two people. That’s power!
I suggest that you put this to them: “Emily has a disease. It’s called addiction use disorder. She needs treatment. If she had cancer or diabetes, wouldn’t you encourage her to get treatment?” My favorite phrase describing this dynamic is that people who repeatedly save addicts from the consequences of their disease are actually “loving them to death.”
However, their personal hygiene is poor, as is their diet, and they are not physically active, which has caused them to put on weight.Our hope was that by exercising regularly and trying to eat well we were being good role models.
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