A letter writer has some concerns about their best friend selling her house to buy an RV with her boyfriend.
Six months later, she met “Chris” on a dating website. He was one of five or six guys she was seeing. After four months, she decided she really liked him, and they became exclusive. I’ve seen her four times since then. Now I’m lucky if I talk to her once a month.Her birthday is coming up, so we caught up. She told me that her daughter and the daughter’s girlfriend are taking over her house, while she will live in the basement. They will pay the mortgage and buy the house in about a year.
She and her boyfriend are going to get out of debt, save their money, and, in a year, buy their RV. I’m concerned because the one thing she has always had is her house. It’s the house she grew up in. No house, no foundation. I’ve met the guy once, and he seems to be a good guy. She did an amazing job working on herself the past two years, but I believe she is jumping in way too quickly. I want to know how to express my concerns. Or should I just be happy for her?Close, intimate, longtime friends get to tell one another the truth, as long as they also accept the possible consequences. Sometimes, the most effective way to do this is through simple statements, followed by thoughtful questions, and listening with intent.
After you initiate a thoughtful, nonjudgmental conversation and listen to her answers — then you should step back and be happy for her.My daughter, who is in her 40s, has always had a bit of a weight problem, as have I. But having to work from home during the coronavirus pandemic resulted in her gaining even more weight. I think she is around 80 pounds overweight.
We are very close, and I am sympathetic since I have struggled with weight issues since I was a teenager. But even though I could lose 10 pounds, I am at a healthy weight and am careful to get exercise and try to eat well.I blame myself for her weight gains, since when my kids were young, I baked a lot. My sons have never gained much weight, but sadly my daughter shares my love of all things sweet.
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