How comparing ourselves to others can block our personal growth—and what to do about it, writes KristenCarterMS
.” Festinger’s theory casts a wide net, saying that, in general, we look to others to establish a point of reference so that we can figure out how we stack up. We want to know how we appear to others. This theory has gone through some evolution over the years, and rightly so. There have been many social changes since Festinger came up with his theory.
Now, of course, there are many more “others.” Because of social media, it can appear that everyone is having a better time than we are, is more successful, is happier, and has more friends. There is a constant barrage of programs to help you be more successful, reach your goals, and earn the respect of others. Clickbait has supplied us with phrases like, “feel more secure,” “make yourOften in goal setting, we are encouraged to follow the SMART acronym.
As such, how you choose each goal is a critical piece that SMART goals leave out. If, like so many others, you are thinking the “new you” looks like the “after” pictures your see in advertisements, there is a problem.of getting there and everything to do with, some sort of “new you” that will make you happy. Again, according to social comparison theory and many other studies, this kind of thing is normal. Our brains want us to be like what see on TV or elsewhere.
To fight back, we need to help people redesign their thoughts about goal setting for health and fitness. For example, how does one set up their overarching goals? Where exactly are they headed when they start the process? What is their definition of the “new me"?, a few key things need to happen.Research has shown again and again that it is what lifts you up and develops a sense of achievement that keeps you engaged in the process of change—not something that compares you to others and runs the risk of making you feel like a failure.
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