Ant Out Of Its Fucking Mind If It Thinks It Getting Any Of Man’s Pie

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Ant Out Of Its Fucking Mind If It Thinks It Getting Any Of Man’s Pie
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HOLLY, MI—Pulling his plate back from the approaching insect, local picnicker Mike Hansen told an ant Monday that it was out of its fucking mind if it thought it was getting any of his pie. “Excuse me, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Hansen said to the ant that paused slightly at the man’s movement before…

HOLLY, MI—Pulling his plate back from the approaching insect, local picnicker Mike Hansen told an ant Monday that it was out of its fucking mind if it thought it was getting any of his pie. “Excuse me, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Hansen said to the ant that paused slightly at the man’s movement before continuing across the picnic table to the slice of lemon meringue pie he was enjoying.

“Oh, you think you’re just gonna waltz on up here from your little anthill, unannounced, and try to put those nasty insect feet all over my delicious slice of lemon meringue pie without so much as a ‘please’? Now, I know you must have lost your damn mind if you think I’m just gonna sit back and let you take my dessert without a fight.” At press time, Hansen reportedly gave the ant several unheeded warnings before flicking the rude insect 10 feet away from his picnic.

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