Anna Marie Tendler's Memoir Is a Study in Releasing Rage

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Anna Marie Tendler's Memoir Is a Study in Releasing Rage
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The artist and photographer on writing her first memoir and why more men should be reading books by women.

Anna Marie Tendler is many things: a fine art photographer, a Victorian lampshade designer, a hair and makeup stylist, a beauty blogger, and now, a published author. “My original pitch wasn’t for a memoir but for a coffee-table book of photography with a few personal essays,” Tendler tellsfrom her whimsical country home in Connecticut. “Reimagining it as memoir was my editor’s idea, and though I was nervous, I knew it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up.

offers an original portrait of a woman who’s reached the apex of her rage against the patriarchy, a field guide to contemporary mental health practices, and a moving testament to the possibility of growth and healing. Below, Tendler opens up about her writing process, her current favorite recipe, and the album she can’t stop listening to on repeat.

Did the process of writing the book change your relationship to the experiences you were writing about? It did: a lot of the anger dissipated from them. One of my big goals for the book was to write about the things that made me angry but to write about them in a constructive way. I tried to think: what’s the most constructive language, framing, or way of showing both sides of this scenario? I also believe that stuff gets stored in your body, and being able to get it out can be very helpful.Yes, definitely. I have a real inferiority complex about my work, which I think other women can relate to.

Because of everything going on in my life at the time, I had to be really flexible with my schedule. But before I sat down to write, I’d always cleanse my desk, computer, and body with palo santo or sage from an Indigenous beader who sells beautiful jewelry through her company,I pull tarot cards weekly, if not daily. I see a tarot card reader, know my birth chart, and keep up with astrology. That said, I don’t think these things predict the future.

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