'There are only a few three-alarm fires in the restaurant business. The fire department is here. The health department is here. Or Dave Portnoy is here.'
,) follow the exact same format; Portnoy stands outside of a pizza restaurant somewhere in the country with a piping hot, no-toppings cheese pie in hand, and submits a highly specific grade between 0 and 10. The “One Bite Pizza Reviews,” as they’re known, are notoriously stringent. After over 1,000 reviews, only 22 pizzerias have managed to score a 9.0 or above, and most pizzas struggle to breach the 7.0 threshold .
It’s hard to articulate the precise lane Portnoy occupies in American culture. On the most basic level, he’s the centrifugal force behind the rise of the aforementioned Barstool Sports, the churlish sports-media enterprise that primarily caters to fifth-year-senior frat guys and divorced personal injury attorneys.
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