Maybe not the perfect Shed. But in some ways not far off
Mrs Shed came back unexpectedly early from a visit to her mother’s the other day. That was unlucky for Shed, who was doing the tango with the postmistress in the back porch at the time. You could hardly hear Nat King Cole’s ‘Let’s Face The Music’ over the creaking of Shed’s knees, but you could easily hear Mrs Shed lustily joining in with the line ‘there may be trouble ahead’ as Shed nervously reached for his protective colander.
Some would say that the gap between how Alfas look and how they go has widened somewhat since the glory days of the '60s. That’s not to say that the more modern Alfas have gone horribly. It’s more that the blend of ingredients has shifted. The Giugiaro-desigend Brera looked the absolute Billy Bs when it appeared as a concept at the 2002 Geneva show.
Those numbers sound all right but unfortunately there are some other numbers that don’t. One is the weight. As Shed will sadly tell you, excess weight is a romance-killer. All early Brera V6s were all-wheel drive. Front-drive versions didn’t arrive until 2008 when Alfa started to put more aluminium into the Brera in an attempt to cut some lard, but before then manual JTS V6s with the Torsen-type Q4 AWD gubbins came in at 1,630kg, compared to 1,540kg in the ’08 FWD cars.
It didn’t accommodate families very well though, the back seats being pretty much only good for folding down in order to increase the boot space to a useful 300 litres. Well, it would have been useful if you didn’t mind risking your back loading stuff in there, as the aperture was designed for style rather than sense. Talking of non-sense, here’s another bad number: £735 for the vehicle tax.
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