The rulings against YouTube and Meta present an excellent chance for parents to rethink and reset how their kids interact with social media, expert Kara Alaimo says.
On Wednesday, a California jury found what many parents probably already suspected: Two social media companies have been negligent in designing their platforms — and they knew it. The jury ordered Meta and YouTube to pay a total of $3 million in compensatory damages plus additional punitive damages to a woman, now 20 years old, who said their platforms were engineered to addict her and caused her body dysmorphia, anxiety and suicidal thoughts.
She previously settled her case against Snap and TikTok. The decision comes on the heels of Tuesday’s ruling by a New Mexico jury that Meta violated state law by not protecting kids from sexual predators. Wednesday’s ruling has been widely described as a “Big Tobacco moment” because it found that social networks are harmful and addictive to our kids and could open the floodgates for many more lawsuits. This court finding is scary for parents because most of our kids are probably already on these platforms. But it also gives us a valuable opportunity to rethink and reset how our kids use social media. Talk with your kids Talk to your kids about the rulings. They may be interested to know we didn’t have all the evidence we have now about the impacts of social media when they first started using these platforms. Then discuss how you can make changes based on this new knowledge. Start by talking through how social media actually makes your kids feel. What emotions are they experiencing when they log off? The popular belief that these platforms give us pleasure is wrong, Michaeleen Doucleff writes in her new book, “Dopamine Kids: A Science-Based Plan to Rewire Your Child’s Brain and Take Back Your Family in the Age of Screens and Ultraprocessed Foods.” Actually, after using social media, our kids often don’t feel good, she said, because apps are designed to leave them always wanting more. You can explain how social networks have been engineered to hook us. They show kids content they think will keep them engaged, even when it’s really bad for them. And our feeds keep serving us endless posts, so there aren’t signals that it’s ever time to stop scrolling. Then think about what changes you can make — not just to protect your family from the harms of social media, but also so you’ll all be happier. Start by asking kids for their ideas. They’ll probably have some smart ones. Make a social media strategy Here’s some of Doucleff’s advice, which she even tested on her own daughter. Talk to parents of your kids’ friends As I’ve said before, it’s ideal not to let kids under age 16 use social media at all. Of course, that restriction can be really difficult to enforce because, if all of our kids’ friends are on social media, we deprive them of social opportunities by not letting them use these apps. These rulings provide an enormously helpful opening to change that dynamic. Use them as an opportunity to talk to the parents of your kids’ friends and agree that none of your kids will use these harmful platforms. If your children’s friends aren’t on these sites either, nobody will miss out on social connections. Instead, they can communicate on landlines — or on watches or phones that allow them to talk and text but not connect to the internet. Talk about how your kids can get together face-to-face. Contrary to the popular perception that young people prefer social media, they love hanging out with their friends in person. This week’s rulings are an important reckoning for our country because they recognize that social networks pose serious dangers to our kids. The verdicts also provide a rationale for parents to have reckonings in our homes about how we can make healthier choices about our technology use. Take advantage of the opportunity.
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