“Have I changed? I am certainly more super-attuned to plastic. Even better, I’ve gained a big twitchy aversion to it. But indulging can feel like a true treat”
Photo: MONTY_RAKUSEN/Getty Images/Cultura RF One average afternoon on this cursed earth, after my friend Celina told me she’d met an elegant doctor who wasn’t buying any plastic for a whole month, I surprised us all by saying: oh yes, I too will do that.
Welcome to Wednesday: Day One of My Heroic Purity 7:15 a.m. Before leaving for a work trip, my boo brings me a delicious surprise coffee in bed. I look at my person and the plastic coffee lid and think: ffffuuuuuuggghhhhcckk. Yesterday, I learned that even the inside of these cups are coated in plastic.
11:00 a.m. Teeth-cleaning appointment! I ask the dentist about alternatives to plastic floss. She recommends silk floss or a water pik. Did you know that regular citizens are allowed to own those? Our consumer rights are expansive.2:15 p.m. I have late class Wednesday, so I usually cook a delicious big dinner to cheer myself when I’m pouty later. I gotta use some nearly sad parsnips and carrots today. Coconut milk comes in a can; ginger has no packaging! What an amazing coincidence.
In the scheme of climate change, I know that plastic is a red herring. My personal eradication of plastic is but one fleck of glitter at the rave: it’s extremely tiny, negligible, and maybe misdirecting attention away from The Main Concern. But we are people capable of many things at once. I can deal with my glitter speck and also have plenty of time to get furious at some Congressfolk, which I am all the time anyway.
2:30 p.m. With the natural deodorants, it’s always fingers crossed that it works, so here’s my update. A chill friend said: Yeah you smell good. Photo: Chris Ryan/Getty Images/Caiaimage Friday: Day 3 of My Plucky Lark of Ethical Consumption in Late-Capitalism 7:45 a.m. I look at the bar of soap when I get into a shower and feel unthrilled.
1:45 a.m. I leave. My informative cigarette pal wishes me “good luck with your plastic!” Then she grabs my arm firmly, intently stares at me and sings: “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world. It’s made of plastic. It’s fantastic.” Our hymn from a simpler time. I highly recommend the mesh nets! I learn the tare weight of my jars for dried goods. The butcher puts the chicken in a paper thing and I don’t need the canister I had brought. I’m excited to get boxes of pasta, and then see that all of them have these little plastic windows so we can see what we’re getting. I’m infuriated about this. Vice is everywhere.
Later, I get their review of my new toothpaste potion. “It’s nutmeg,” they say, “it’s not off-putting, but it’s not that crisp.” A haunting breath critique. 7:15 p.m. Without even telling them about my vow, my friends bring zero-plastic offerings to dinner: wine, baguettes, and chocolate. Garlic dinner is great!
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