Personal Perspective: There must be a line between the good hope that gets me up in the morning and to physical therapy and the bad hope that is unrealistic and can break my heart.
Hoping for something that is unlikely to happen can be harmful.A month has passed since my neck surgery , and I’m doing great. The incision is less Frankenstein-y every day, and I can even drive. The worst side effect has been with my nerves. Specifically, the tips of the ring and pinky fingers on my left hand have little to no sensation, thus requiring me to look at my hand when I type words like “wax” and “saw.” I can definitely live with that as my biggest limitation.
It’s a sweet and reasonable wish for a mom to have, but I found myself arguing with her: “It won’t be, and we have to accept that.”, which results in undue wear and tear and my joints. So far, at the tender age of 50, I’ve needed two knee surgeries, two hip surgeries, and three spine surgeries. There is no cure for the condition; the best thing I can do is keep my muscles as strong as possible to support my joints.
Nevertheless, I still experienced that surge of frustration at my mom for her positive outlook because it’s also true that too much hope and optimism sometimes has me, and that has me doing things and going to events and acting in ways that I know will cost and possibly injure me. For example, three weeks after my surgery I decided it was a good idea to drive half an hour away and sit in a lawn chair to watch my son play in the state ultimate frisbee tournament.
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