A Controversial Favorite

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A Controversial Favorite
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Some people will be mad, but Crocs are the moment. GoogleShoppingXPAPER

I unknowingly picked out my footwear for the end of the world early last year, when I came across one of these brand collaborations in my office’s discarded PR gift pile. A pair of black and purple Crocs, with a rainbow KISS logo, and portraits of the famously face-painted rockers splashed around the base. It was an unholy union that also made perfect sense.

Over the next few months, the KISS Crocs accompanied me on my bleak pre-Zoom walks across Bed Stuy, Brooklyn with the glam rock heroes bearing witness to crowded funeral parlors and illegally evicted tenants sleeping on the street and in their cars. They listened to new records when they dropped at midnight, and bingewatched all the true crime documentary series. As the weather warmed up, the news got worse and a legion of police helicopters whirred in a holding pattern above my block.

In the fall I drove out west, unable to commit to the ominous winter ahead. My Crocs accompanied me to Utah, immediately acquiring a layer of red desert dust that has permanently muddied the Peter Criss’ black-and-white whiskers, perhaps affecting their resale value. I settled for a while in Hurricane, a small town near Zion National Park with painterly sunsets and tourist trap trading posts. In these parts it was not unusual to see unironic Crocs on the street or in the supermarket aisle.

Before returning to New York in the spring, I dipped down to Florida, the KISS Croc’s spiritual home. I wore my pair all down the coast until reaching the Everglades, where they mingled with alligators and manatees, and then further still to the tip of the Florida Keys, where they merged seamlessly with the prevailing parrot head, conch-brained aesthetic. They proved their practicality, too: the Croc is a watersporting shoe at heart.

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