4 Reasons Why We Refuse to Feel a Feeling

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4 Reasons Why We Refuse to Feel a Feeling
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Why it's so hard to accept big emotions—and how you can make it easier

for the roof over their heads when they feel sad may learn that only extreme circumstances deserve negative emotional responses. These beliefs become ingrained in a person’s schema about the world and leave little room to accept difficult feelings.In addition to internal judgment about our emotional experience, we may face external judgment. If we are surrounded by family members, friends, and romantic partners who respond poorly to our feelings, we may try to prevent them from happening.

may grow into adults who find the prospect of feeling difficult feelings overwhelming. Children need to see the adults in their lives managing difficult emotional experiences in healthy ways and feel supported when they themselves express unruly feelings. Without these experiences, as adults, they will have no roadmap for identifying their emotions, verbalizing their experience, accepting the feeling, and coping with it in healthy, effective ways.

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