Frequent criticism early in life can affect not only how you feel about yourself but also the quality of your relationships. Here's what you can do about it, by sethgillihan
15. You often overthink things.lead you to spend a lot of time in your head: analyzing, reviewing, second guessing. You might spend so much time in your head that you even feel cut off from your own body.On a basic level you don’t feel like you’re “enough”: not smart enough, good looking enough, successful enough, rich enough. You try to make up for these feelings by working really hard and going the extra mile.
Not everyone who was raised with a lot of self-criticism will develop these patterns, and having a few of them doesn’t necessarily mean you had a critical parent. But if you recognize yourself in many of these descriptions, take a moment to acknowledge your history and how it may have contributed to ongoing struggles.
And take heart—these tendencies are not etched in stone. You may not reverse them completely, but with consistent awareness and practice you can learn new ways of being.Connect with your body and breath in this moment. Take a breath in and out with gentle awareness. Feel the goodness in each breath, and recognize all that is right in the here and now.Consider the possibility that you’re not defective in the ways you imagine.
Make a vow not to abandon yourself to your automatic conditioning, and instead guard your mind and heart. Stay close enough to your experience that you know who you are, and no self-critical thoughts can disrupt that bedrock understanding.Madjar, N., Voltsis, M., & Weinstock, M. P. . The roles of perceived parental expectation and criticism in adolescents’ multidimensional perfectionism and achievement goals.McLeod, B. D., Weisz, J. R., & Wood, J. J. .
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